What's in your invisible index card?

"I’m not nervous before my runs… so why am I so disappointed afterward?”

I hear this all the time. You don’t feel nervous. You’re not shaking or sweating. You're doing your breathing. You’re visualizing. And yet — the pressure’s still there. It just shows up differently.

Here’s what might really be happening: You’re carrying invisible expectations into the ring.

Most handlers are. And the sneaky part? You might not even realize they’re there.

Invisible mantras = hidden pressure

Let’s talk about what I call your “invisible index card.” These are the thoughts, beliefs, and quiet expectations you’re taking with you every time you step to the line.

They’re not written down. You’re not consciously thinking them. But they’re there — and they’re shaping everything from your energy to your confidence to how you process mistakes.

Common invisible index card beliefs sound like:

• “I should be able to do this.”
• “I have to Q this weekend.”
• My dog knows this stuff.
• “We’ve trained so much — we should have this by now.”
• “It’s just one run, don’t screw it up.”

Sound familiar?

These thoughts act like internal mantras — but instead of calming you or grounding you, they pile on the pressure. And when you fall short? They make it feel so much worse.

How to uncover yours

Here’s the tricky part: these thoughts often hide in plain sight. Even my most self-aware clients struggle to spot them at first. They feel like truths, not beliefs.

If you want to uncover your invisible index card, try this:

• After a run, ask: What did I expect to happen? What would’ve made me disappointed?
• Before a run, ask: If things don’t go well, what am I afraid it will mean?
• Listen for words like should, need to, or have to. Those are red flags.
• Pay attention to what stings. Disappointment is often a sign that you were carrying expectations you didn’t realize you had.

You can also journal about it, talk it out with a coach or friend, or even record yourself reflecting out loud. The goal is to catch the thoughts that usually go unquestioned.

Write a better card

Now here’s where we flip the script.

If you’re going to carry a message into the ring — and we all are — let’s make it a good one.

I’m a big fan of actual index cards. Write one before each trial day. Put it in your trial bag. Read it when you arrive or before you walk to the ring.

Here are some ideas:

• “I trust our training.”
• “Connection over control.”
• “We get better every run.”
• “Breathe, smile, handle.”

The point isn’t to be perfect. It’s to be intentional.

Let this be your reminder: your thoughts are part of your gear bag. And they deserve just as much attention as your course maps. What’s on your invisible index card? And more importantly… is it helping you Q?

I’m going deeper into this idea on this week’s podcast — especially how to catch those sneaky pressure-building thoughts before they hijack your mindset. Tune in if this hit home for you.

And if you want more mindset tools like this — ones you can actually use — come join us in the membership. We’re working on this stuff together, every single week.

You don’t have to carry pressure that you didn’t mean to pack. 🐾