Choose magic.

anxiety & fear mindset Oct 31, 2023

We are anthropologically wired to look for the bad stuff. To look for the danger, the things that might go wrong. This behavior has kept us safe from bears, and fire, and toxic cave-people (I assume). When we scan our environment for danger to find none, we can then focus on the task at hand - but we are constantly scanning.


No matter how hard we try, this wiring is not going away. But left unchecked, it becomes anxiety (or nerves, or stress, or worry ... you choose your word). At the root, we fear that which might happen, aka the future unknown. We stress out because we don't know where the dangers might be, so we stay ever-vigilant even while we are safe.


Does this sound like a waste of our extraordinary imagination? It is. It also puts us in a constant state of living in the future, skipping right over the present moment. I get it. In addition to us being wired this way, our past experiences tell us we need to be prepared. We laugh and call ourselves "control freaks," when in reality, we fear that we don't know.


I've had a LOT of great surprises in my life - so have you. The way some things fell into place as if magic. Or the way we unexpectedly received something better than our dream. Every dog in my home comes with a "story" - your dogs, too, I bet. Sometimes, the things we allow to unfold are even more magical than our wildest imaginings.


What stress and magic both require from us is to stay in the present moment and live our current lives - not the future ones or the past ones - our current lives. Stress feeds off fear of future happenings and bits of evidence from the past. Because our brains love to be correct, we drag our history out of the closet as proof we should worry about the future. But there is no magic in that - no allowing, no growing.


I'm not going to convince you to drop your addiction to worry in an email, but I do hope to make you more aware of how your fears are blocking the future you desire. When we repeat the same behaviors to stay safe, we carve out the same life as yesterday. Recognize when your thoughts drift into future worries and bring them back to what you are doing right now and be fully present.


Look around, listen, and enjoy what's happening around you. If you are on a walk, be fully on the walk - notice the trees, the birds, and the sounds of your dogs. If you are standing at the in-gate, check in with your dog, your breathing, and wiggle your toes in your shoes. These are magical moments, the ones you will long to remember in a dozen years.


There is magic all around us all the time. We can either choose to rush through life focused on future stuff that may or may not happen or take a beat and enjoy what's right in front of us. Sure, I have "99 problems" like everyone else, but I make sure to see the magic, and that shifts my mindset into something WAY more positive and productive. Even when everything seems wrong, find just a few magical moments in your day.


If you need 1:1 support to get you out of your head and into a more productive mindset, you might be ready for coaching - just sayin' ;)

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